This sweet little lady had just seen the worst of me 😩

As I pull back the curtain to our little “room” my hands are shaking. It’s 6am, we’ve been up all night. I’m tried, frustrated, and feeling helpless. I just raised my voice at the sweetest most kind little nurse you could imagine. She’s 5 foot tall (if that) has her soft blonde hair pulled back in a bun, clipped into place not for looks but to secure it. Same with her clothing, her coat pockets are all filled so she can grab things quickly. She has a little make up on, some color around her eyes, and blush that enhances her cute cheeks and makes her bright smile ever warmer. This sweet little lady, had just seen the worst of me.

My daughter was in so much pain, it was literally making her throw up. She would have chills one minute and sweats the next. She was crying and saying “mommy I can’t take it.” I had rushed to get her to the ER where they would help. When we got there, there was only one other patient, thank goodness! The sweet little nurse got her worked up and into a room quick. We were right beside the one other patient. I seen the doctor sitting on her phone and four nurses sitting and talking, and I thought “oh good, they’ll be able to help her quick!”

After about 20 minutes the entire staff is still sitting. At this point I’m still calm. I have acquired patience. Some things we go through in life teach you how small most other things truly are. So I’m sitting there just trying to keep my daughter calm and assuring her they’ll be in here any minute. I look up and one of the nurses brings a little ceasars fund raiser paper back to the Dr. and tells her “I’ll bring you the money tomorrow, I don’t have cash on me.” Then continues to tell her how she’s so bad to never have cash on her, she always uses a card blah blah blah, ok at this point I’m a little upset. The desk where they’re sitting is only about ten feet from the bed my baby is crying in. I know they hear her, and yet they’re worried about pizza money. So I walk over and tell the physician my daughter is really in a lot of pain, she isn’t the type to complain so I know she’s really hurting bad.

Now when I say this woman is part sloth I am in no way joking or exaggerating. I have never in my life seen anyone or anything move so slow. She slides her chair back at a record breaking slow speed, then climbs up out of it like a turtle trying to get out of a card board box. She’s not old or over weight. She is very tall and a little hard to understand as speaks very low and has a thick accent. This young yet decrepit woman creeps over to the wall to get a pair of gloves and then finally she’s coming our way! All of a sudden granny clampit slowly slides her feet around and starts goin back the other direction. 😳😒 What on earth is she doing now?!

Masks. Are you kidding me? She went back after them like a child going to pick their own switch. Finally the crypt keeper makes it over to us; we tell her everything that’s going on. It was pretty obvious Kamryn had a kidney stone. Besides the pain, there was other medical proof plus a family history of them. Kidney stone pain is one of the worst pains you can have, that’s common knowledge. The Doctor tells us she’s going to give her something for pain, fluids, and something for nausea. Of course it takes the human sloth ten minutes to get her gloves off and her hands washed before she gives any instruction to the staff or any information down. As I sit and watch this, I’m trying to assure Kamryn that it won’t be long now. However, I am getting pretty frustrated.

After another 25 minutes the nurse comes with her iv. Thank goodness, right? Nope, she only started the iv so it would be done for when they get her medicine ready. Then, here comes the phlebotomist to take her blood. Kamryn starts crying. She’s getting to the point where she can’t take it, and now she has to sit still for blood work while in this kind of pain. I go to see what is taking so long. This is something I Hate doing. My mom is a nurse practitioner and my brother a nurse, both whom have worked in hospitals, so I know there are times they’re doing their best regardless of how it seems. This obviously wasn’t the case here, but still I feel bad even having to do it.

A few minutes later she finally gets her medicine! Or so we thought. I’m looking at her face and I see no relief. I’m wondering why it isn’t helping because when I had kidney stones it always helped me right away. She begins to get worse. I think in her mind she had counted on it helping so when it didn’t her body just reached its breaking point. She starts throwing up again so I take her to the bathroom and while she’s humped over she says “mommy I can’t do this I can’t.” When they heard her still crying and throwing up, the nurse came over to the bathroom. I asked her if she gave Kamryn something for nausea and she said yes. She looked at me like she was so sorry. We both knew at this point if this kid is still throwing up, she’s in some serious pain. I asked what did she give her for pain and she said toradol. That’s when I reached my breaking point. I knew toradol was like Motrin and not effective with kidney stone pain and I’m not a physician, so I knew they had to know this as well. Why this doctor was being so cruel to her, I had no idea, but I was over it. I yelled loud enough so the human sloth would hear me. I don’t remember my exact words but I told them that I could of gave her Motrin at home, and that it was ridiculous we had been there well over an hour and she was still in this much pain. The nurse said “They don’t like to give kids anything strong because of the opioid crisis.” I yelled “She’s MY kid, I obviously don’t like the thought of her having it either but Look at her! She’s putiful!” She didn’t say anything back to me just put her head down. I know she felt so bad for Kamryn. There was nothing she could do as she’s under the instruction of the tortoise.

Within a few minutes of getting her back into the bed, here comes her nurse with the proper medication. They were able to get it that fast, so why did they not do that when we first got there? This doctor let a 14 year old girl sit in intense pain for well over an hour. Later a ct scan confirmed it was kidney stones, multiple. I understand they have to be careful giving narcotics, especially to minors but they knew with the type of pain she was in, she needed it. There was little to no doubt it was kidney stones before a test confirmed it. Soon as she gave it to her Kamryn finally relaxed. I could tell she was relieved, so then this mama bear was relieved. Sort of. I felt terrible for raising my voice at this sweet little lady. When she came back to check on Kamryn, I told her I was so sorry for getting hateful with her. None of it was even on her, and yet she was the one that had to hear it the most. Her exact words were “oh hunnie you’re fine, I get hateful over my babies too!” She had just seen the worst of me and here I’m Still only seeing the best of her. Her patience, her kindness, and the quality care she gave my daughter. She wasn’t the only nurse there yet she was the only one working, and she never complained. I haven’t even mentioned how the other patient that was there would holler for her every 30 minutes giving her different information, wanting different medications for different illnesses. She never even let it show how annoyed she had to be at that person. She also knew early on kamryn needed more help, but she never went against the doctor’s instruction or gave her any suggestions.

This got me thinking, nurses really do see the worst of all of us. It’s easy for us to be good people when things are going good for us. When times get hard and we go though the lows, that’s when it becomes hard to remain righteous. One of the biggest things atheists like to say is “why does God allow all these bad things to happen?” Well, first off because he gave us free will. When he gives us something he doesn’t half give it or give it with terms and conditions, he gives it all and he doesn’t take it back. A lot of the bad out there is from us trying to live this life without him. We can’t do anything on our own. He handed us a perfect world, and we made the choice to eat the apple. Jesus died for us because we couldn’t save ourselves. Secondly, we all face trials and tribulations. They act as tests revealing our true nature. We either go through them with Grace and come out better, or we let them break us and resort to losing our dignity. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr said “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands in moments of challenge and controversy.” So if you ever wanna know if someone is a good person, just ask a nurse! ;)